How to show up as an ally
Do’s & don’ts when talking to trans people
There’s no harm in stating the obvious: it may not be obvious to everyone. A few key steps to being an effective trans ally, whether you’re helping out or just here to learn.
Respect names and pronouns
Always use a person’s correct name and pronouns. If you make a mistake, apologize, correct yourself, and move on, without making a scene.
Don’t assume gender
Avoid assuming someone’s gender based on appearance, and introduce yourself with your own pronouns to set a welcoming tone.
Respect privacy: never share someone’s trans status or former name (“deadname”) without their explicit permission.Speak up against transphobia
Challenge transphobic jokes, remarks, and actions, even when no trans people are present.
Educate yourself
Take the initiative to learn about trans issues, terminology, and experiences, rather than relying on trans people to teach you.
Avoid invasive questions
Don’t ask about a person’s anatomy, medical history, or surgical status.
How our Helpers show up
Trauma-informed care. Across every role, we prioritize a welcoming environment and stay mindful of the energy we bring to our Seekers and Transplants. Safety, physical and emotional, trustworthiness, transparency, peer support, collaboration, empowerment, and cultural responsiveness guide everything we do.
Our strongest connections are built one-to-one. If you can spare time or skills, you can change someone’s arrival.